Hesitation, sensation, and the trickle of blood

I’ve probably tested my own blood more than 300 times now.  16 strips per thingy1, 3 thingies per box, easily had 8 boxes.  Which means I’ve made over 300 holes in my fingers.  After much trial and error I found that my left little finger is the best candidate.  Doesn’t get used for much typing, heals pretty quick.  When I started out, I’d spread it around (although I was testing a lot more then) and do a couple of shots in each finger, but eventually my fingers would hurt too much.  Which is when I learned to concentrate on just one finger.

Anyway, after all this time, and over 300 goes, I still hesitate before I click the plunger and send the little needle into my finger.  I still pause, I still wonder if this is going to hurt (it doesn’t really unless my fingers are cold).  Something in my brain still shouts ‘why are you doing this fool?’

And then I bleed a little and my brain goes ‘see? see what you did!’

  1. tub? tube? barrel? canister? whatever []